


Ambrosia

by wasteofchances



Series: Sun and Moon [2]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Boyfriends, Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-29
Updated: 2018-07-29
Packaged: 2019-06-18 07:28:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15480666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wasteofchances/pseuds/wasteofchances
Summary: One look and Yuta feels his heart drop to his stomach.It’s Lee-fucking-Taeyong, in his entire glory, standing a table away from him, placing his bags and books on the table.





	Ambrosia

**Author's Note:**

> this can be read as a stand-alone but I advice you guys gals and non binary pals to read plumeria first because thats where things start to get saucy 
> 
> happy reading!

“Whoever came up with the phrase—”

Yuta doesn’t react to whatever Doyoung is saying; his gaze remains fixated on the most recent victim of his wrath.

 “‘If looks could kill’ was definitely thinking of you while drafting it,” Doyoung finishes off his sentence while chewing the last bits of his muffin.

Yuta stays mute; jaw clenched, nostrils flared, eyes wide open. Doyoung waves his hand in front of Yuta’s face; the lack of reaction makes him laugh out of disbelief. Yuta feels his left eye twitch when a blue sweater blocks his view. He looks up immediately, a bundle of curse words on the tip of his tongue but his expression softens the second his eyes meet the figure blocking his view.

“HYUNG,” Yukhei says, his loud voice fitting perfectly with his over exaggerated demeanor.

Yuta passes him a sweet smile, somewhere between the exchanges of pleasantries Yuta hears Doyoung mutter in a low voice,‘ _thank God, I thought his jaw would never unclench,’_ which makes him smile for a second, till he remembers the source of his discomfort. To add onto his current predicament, Yukhei unknowingly settles down on the chair right in front of him. Yuta stands up, his ass hovering above the seat of his chair and looks past the younger man. His jaw clenches again. He sits down while maintaining a careful watch of what’s happening behind Yukhei.

“Xuxi,” Yuta says, his voice unwavering. “Sit here.” He points to the empty chair next to him.

Yukhei knits his brows in confusion. He looks at Yuta, then at Doyoung who just waves him off and goes back to his work.

“But hyung, why?”

The innocence in Yukhei’s tone matches his doe-y eyes and Yuta feels his anger tone down. “Just- please—“

“You’re blocking his view of the very beautiful Lee Taeyong,” Johnny says, a little too loudly, while claiming the empty seat next to Yuta.

“Shut up.” Yuta swats Johnny’s arm.

“Lee Taeyong? Why does that name sound familiar—oh, HYUNG! Is he the guy you’re in love with?” Yukhei inches his chair closer to the table.

“I am not in love with him,” Yuta fires back immediately. “I like him a normal amount.”

 His response is met with a few giggles from Yukhei and an over exaggerated laugh from Doyoung,

“Please, Yuta,” Doyoung says, trying to catch his breath. “You literally joined the basket ball team last year after finding out that Jaehyun is a part of it and that his ‘model boyfriend’ comes to all of his practices, pre- games, and matches.”

Yuta stares Doyoung dead in the eyes.“Your point?”

“Just admit it, man, you’re hopelessly pinning.” Johnny leans against the back of chair.

“You’re one to talk.” Yuta jabs a finger into Johnny’s shoulder, earning a satisfactory yelp from the other man.

“What does that mean, Hyung?” Yukhei passes him a look of wonderment.

The innocence in Yukhei’s tone breaks Yutas heart “It means no—”

“Hello!”

Yuta looks up, just like everyone, and is met with disappointment in the form Jung Jaehyun.

 “What do you want?” Yuta mutters, bitterness obvious in his voice. Johnny kicks him from under the table but Yuta doesn’t even flinch. What adds on to his annoyance is that Jaehyun doesn’t pay heed to his tone, instead he continues to wear a smile that shows off his dimples.

“I came to say ‘Hi’, and return this,” Jaehyun places a notebook in front of Yuta. “You left it here yesterday. Yongie found it.”

Yuta looks at the book quizzically – it’s definitely his and, yes, he forgot it here, but who the hell is—

“Oh, I’m sorry, I meant Taeyong Hyung found it.” Jaehyun is massaging the back of his neck and Yuta can think of at least ten different ways of ending his pain immediately. Instead of thanking Jaehyun, Yuta tilts his head and looks past him only to find the table Jaehyun and Taeyong had been occupying empty.

His gaze returns to the book sitting in front of him, he mumbles a quite ‘ _thank you’_ that Jaehyun catches anyway.

“You’re welcome,” he says with a smile, “Well, I’m going to head out. It was nice meeting you guys.”

Yuta hears Johnny reply with ‘ _same here’_ with an awfully cheery tone. Yuta scoffs at that –‘ _what a fool.’_

Yuta’s entire body recoils with envy. He moves his arm a little too aggressively which results in half of his book smelling like coffee. Johnny offers a consolatory pat on his back while Yuta watches Jaehyun and Taeyong exit the café with their hands laced together and sharing disgustingly happy smiles. Yuta thinks that sometimes life is unbearably unfair.

<> 

 

**_3:15 p.m._ **

His student is late.

 Yuta doesn’t exactly consider himself impatient (it’s kind of stupid to get upset over trivial things such as _time_ ),but today his temper is running thin. Due to some mess up, he lost all the information Lay had sent him a week ago about his students because of which he’s had to deal with two no shows and two girls who spent the entirety of the session staring at him and absorbing no information whatsoever.

 All he knows, through a half-assed text from Lay, is that his student for today’s session is a guy and that he’s struggling with a course about convertible debts and dilutive securities. Yuta taps his index finger against the wooden table. His incessant tapping is interrupted by loud thudding steps coming from outside the room which are followed someone aggressively trying to open the door.

“You have to pull it open,” Yuta half yells and turns his gaze away from the door. _‘What a moron’._ He hears the door open, followed by a series of ‘I’m sorry’s’. Yuta turns to look at the guy. One look and Yuta feels his heart drop to his stomach.

It’s Lee-fucking-Taeyong, in his entire glory, standing a table away from him, placing his bags and books on the table.

“I’m so sorry, I had a class on the other side of the campus and I didn’t have any of your contact info either, I—”

Taeyong looks up and Yuta feels a shiver run down his spine. The sea of anger inside him calms down the second he makes eye contact with Taeyong, who’s looking at Yuta with eyes pleading of guilt and apology.

“It’s okay,” Yuta says, he straights his slouchy poster immediately, a sudden gentleness taking over his voice and demeanor. “Shall we start?”

Relief flashes in Taeyong’s eyes and Yuta feels warmth spreading through his entire body.

“Yes, please,” Taeyong says.

<> 

 

Yuta has never been a fan of social conventions, norms and letting other people dictate who/what he’s supposed to be. None of that changed when he fled high school and arrived to university. But, given his position as a member of the university’s football team, he hadn’t been able to avoid outrageous social conventions, or, in simpler terms, frat parties. However, he was able to dodge the fraternizing part completely.

That is until third year of university was kicking his ass with balancing a perfect GPA and maintaining his position as the captain of the football. Yuta resolved to excessive drinking and occasional mingling with random strangers who promised to give him the world for a night but always made him feel shallow the next morning.

Then came the physical embodiment of every form of beauty Yuta has ever seen or experienced, **Lee Taeyong**. He had been so close – _so close_ – to having him, until a heavy hand had dragged him out of Yuta’s lap and the frat house without looking back, leaving Yuta confused, frustrated and alone.

Yuta tried to convince himself that he didn’t want Taeyong – that as long he had a body to hug to sleep that isn’t Taeyong’s, he’ll be okay. It didn’t bother him that Taeyong didn’t make an active effort to pursue him. Besides, their social circles were far enough for Yuta to get through two more grueling years of academics, football, frat parties, and random hook ups, without them ever interacting again. Other than that, every time Yuta saw Taeyong, whether it was on campus or off, a tall, well-built man with blond hair and soft features was always next to him.

It didn’t bother him how close the man always stood next to Taeyong, how they were almost always holding hands and laughing about something. It did flicker a little resentment within Yuta but it was nothing a shot of straight vodka couldn’t shush away.

But, like always, the universe had surprised him. Yuta wasn’t keen on calling it fate, or _destiny_ , but  he was curious to know what string of acts led to him being able spend longer than a second in the same vicinity as Lee Taeyong three times a week.

Taeyong always showed up to their lessons late, breathless, and with a series of apologies at the tip of his tongue. Yuta found himself growing… _softer;_ he wouldn’t exactly label himself as harsh but he had seen how horrible people can be if you’re kind – his sharp features and intense looks resulted in him becoming infamous for being a drill sergeant.

In this situation, however, things were different. Things were always different when it came to Taeyong. The last thing Yuta wanted was to make Taeyong fidget with nervousness around him or experience any sense of discomfort because of him.

With Taeyong came a sense of lightness and a level of patience Yuta hadn’t realized he possessed. 

“I’m sorry—”

“No.” Yuta looked at Taeyong, his poodle-like small face made something _burn_ inside Yuta. “Look, you have to make a table at some point but not yet. The question is asking you to journalize the purchase of the bond in the first part.”

Taeyong, whose eyes were brimming with tears a second ago, sighs in relief. “So I was right?” There’s a mixture of innocence and panic painted all over Taeyong’s face that brings back the burn.

“Yes,” Yuta finds himself smiling, “You get worried too easily, Taeyong.”

“I know, I know. I always end up psyching myself out. It’s not that I’m stupid it’s just sometimes it’s—”

“Confusing, I know.” Yuta says.

Yuta sees a flash of gratefulness in Taeyong’s beautiful eyes. “Most people tend to get confused easily. It’s okay. There are a lot of numbers and sometimes you don’t know what to do with them. Just remember, as long as it’s not a date, it’s useful.”

“Okay, thank you.” Taeyong says while scribbling down what Yuta had just said.

A loud sound of dogs barking interrupted their conversation “You’re wel—”Yuta quickly reached out and turned off the obnoxious timer.

“Well, I’ll see you next week then.” Yuta picks up his stuff and a bundle of keys.

“Actually,” Taeyong muses when they are outside the meeting room. “Are you free on Thursday?”

Yuta feels his brain short circuit; he can feel his heartbeat in his ears. Was Taeyong asking him out?

“It’s just that I have a quiz next week…”

 _‘Nevermind.’_ He thanks God for having his back turned so Taeyong wouldn’t see the obvious flabbergasted-ness on his face. Yuta composes himself, puts away the keys in his back pack and turns to look at Taeyong.

“I understand if you’re busy. I mean, obviously you’re always busy but like, I would appreciate it if you could drop by- I mean it’s okay, like if you can’t, like I’ll understand, but it’s like,fifty percent of my grade—"

 “Where and when?” Yuta readjusts his backpack.

Taeyong titles his head and gives Yuta a once over, as if judging his intentions. “The Tim Hortons near the Medical building. And at twelve but we can change the time if you’re busy.”

“No, it’s okay. I’ll see you on Thursday then.” Yuta summons a half assed smile.

 “Thank you so much,” Taeyong says. Yuta can practically hear the relief in his tone.

Yuta only nods and waves at him before exiting the building. It takes him half a day and an intense workout to pull himself together.

From a broader perspective, this might not be as big of a deal as Yuta is making it out to be. But it’s the first time he’s going to be in the same space as Taeyong, _off_ university grounds, and without the presence of surveillance cameras watching over them, _or Jaehyun._

Yuta opts to sleep instead of over thinking this, he’s still restless but his workout wore him out and he doesn’t want to risk being late to his seven am lecture. He’ll eventually have to either tell Taeyong how he feels or reside to hopeless sulking behind his back.

<> 

Disappointment comes to Yuta in the form of a well-built Casper, a.k.a. Jung Jaehyun. He would label himself a fool for thinking that Taeyong’s invite could turn into a potential _something_.

Jaehyun and Taeyong walk into Tim Hortons holding hands and sharing knowing, smiles like they always do. An uncomfortable sensation runs through Yuta at the sight of that. He tries to maintain collected and not let anything about Jaehyun clutching Taeyong’s hand tightly, do anything to him.

“Hey, you’re here early,” Taeyong says, while pulling out a chair for Jaehyun then for himself.

“Yeah, practice ended early today.”  Yuta shifts in his seat and puts away his phone.

“You have football practice before noon?” Jaehyun questions.

Yuta looks up from his lap, this time actually making eye contact with Jaehyun. He almost didn’t want to reply to Jaehyun because he knew – _he knew –_ this would lead to a full blown conversation with the blonde haired man, which he definitely wasn’t in the mood for.

“Actually…” Taeyong ruffles through a pile of notes that wasn’t there a second ago, “Yuta teaches football to kids. He does volunteer work with the local middle school.”

Yuta feels…. Oddly nice, upon discovering that Taeyong actually pays attention to his non accounting related gibber gabber.

Jaehyun looks at Yuta in awe. “That’s amazing.”

“Oh I’m sorry, we totally skipped introductions.” Taeyong looks up from his notes “Yuta, this is Jaehyun.” Taeyong points at Jaehyun who is displaying his full set of teeth. “We’re both taking the same class. I hope you don’t mind Jaehyun tagging along, I would’ve let you know but I don’t have your number—”

 “That reminds me.” Yuta lifts his backpack from the floor and pulls out his phone from it. “Here, type in your number.”

Taeyong stares at him for a second before slowly taking his phone. “There.” Yuta sends Taeyong a text. “Now you have my number, and also I don’t mind. Let’s get started, shall we?”  Yuta charms the tension of Taeyong with a gentle smile.

He passes Jaehyun a tight smile before opening up his note books. “What are we dealing with today?”

“Actually…”Jaehyun pulls out a neon pink file from his backpack and passes it to Yuta. Yuta stares at the file, its color, a few random black spots and general wornness makes it look so… ugly. “We have all the review material ready so hopefully this won’t take a lot of your time.” Jaehyun smiles at him politely.

Yuta traces the edges of the file, almost complimenting Jaehyun for being so efficient till he opens the file and finds Johnny’s name plastered all over the first page. No wonder it looked so familiar to him.

Yuta stares at Jaehyun, his eyebrows raised and mouth agape. Albeit the fact that Yuta doesn’t know the pair that well, he still feels them go stiff under his gaze.

“Jaehyun,” Yuta starts, he doesn’t mean for it to come out as a reprimand. “How did you get Johnnys notes?”

“He’s Jaehyun’s T.A., like you are mine,” Taeyong answers for Jaehyun, as if the latter doesn’t have a mouth of his own. “He lent his notes to Jaehyun on the condition that he won’t make any copies of them.”

Yuta looks at Jaehyun who’s nodding rather aggressively, Yuta smiles at the pair, “That’s so generous of him.” He drops his gaze to the file in front of him. A smirk finds its way to Yutas face. He makes a mental note to change Johnny’s contact name to ‘ _Whipped Dumbass’_ later.

He catches Jaehyun smiling to himself and Taeyong lightly smacking the back of Jaehyun’s head, muttering, ‘ _focus Jaehyun’._

True to Jaehyun’s words, it doesn’t take them long to go through all the material. They plunge into the practice questions and test topics with sheer determination and finish in almost 2 hours –thanks to Johnny’s generosity.  

“Well, there you go.” Yuta gets up, packing his stuff. “Goodluck for your quiz.” He smiles at the pair, but before he can make his exit, a hand grabs his arm.

“Would you like to have lunch with us?” Taeyong asks.

Yuta doesn’t answer for a minute, contemplating all the possible scenarios that will end up in him not third wheeling the pair and feeling love sick. It’s the look in Taeyong’s eyes that forces him to give in. Otherwise, Yuta argues, he wouldn’t have ever landed himself in a place like this.

Out of every ideal situation that had gone through Yuta’s mind, he would’ve never imagined sitting on a pink picnic blanket in the campus park with Taeyong pulling out home cooked food from his bag and Jaehyun opening a bottle of sparkling water.

“Did your mom send you a package or something?” Yuta questions while Jaehyun hands him a glass of sparking water.

Taeyong laughs. “No, she didn’t.”

“Yongie hyung is a really good cook and a huge health freak, I can’t remember the last time we ordered in food or went out to eat.” Jaehyun answers, with a hint of pride in his voice.

“You know how to cook?” Yuta looks at Taeyong, eyes wide in awe.

“Yes.” Taeyong doesn’t look at him. “And I’m not a health freak, you know, this—” he points at the food “—is just convenient.”

Yuta thinks of all the pre-made k-mart junk him and Johnny live off of. That is after Mark moved out. He stares at the containers in front of him holding the weight of Taeyong’s kindness and generosity. It reminds him of Mark slaving away in the kitchen for hours so him and Johnny wouldn’t die of food poisoning.

Convenient his ass.

“Here,” Taeyong handed him a box, Yuta stared at it.

“You made a separate portion for me?” Yuta tilts the box in his a hand.

‘ _Please say no, please say no please—’_

“Yeah, I figured you might agree. I just wanted to be on the safe side.” Taeyong hands him disposable utensils and gestures him to dig in.

Yuta doesn’t know what is the appropriate course of action to follow. He opts for bowing his head a little and muttering a quite ‘thank you’.

<> 

It’s in one of their group study sessions that, much to Yuta’s apparent whipped-ness and distaste, have become a regular thing. Taeyong asks him for help and Yuta clears out his day for him (because, well, _priorities_ ), and every single time Jaehyun’s well-built shadow follows Taeyong to their study sessions. **Much to Yuta’s distaste.**

Yuta brings it up, and not in a subtle way.

“How long have you two been together?” He prides himself for not stuttering though that question.

Maybe it’s the sheer jealousy that lingers around Yuta till he’s drunk off his ass and holding someone in his arms with an image of a mop of pink hair. It’s the way they look at each other, sharing secrets by the second. It’s the sheer envy that Yuta will never be able indulge Taeyong the way Jaehyun gets to.

He expects them to become a mess of shy glances and flushed cheeks, or present a combo of sly expressions and prominent smirks – the kind to be proud of what they have. What he doesn’t expect, is Taeyong and Jaehyun to look at each other questionably; eyes squinting, eyebrows scrunched.

“Third grade?” Taeyong shrugs.

“I think… second grade. When your scar was still fresh – remember?” Jaehyun replies.

Taeyong claps his hands together in realization. “Yes! When that kid Yujin was an ass to me.”

Jaehyun hums in acknowledgment.

“So, give or take 13 years I think,” Jaehyun says while scribbling something.

 _13 years_? That peaked Yuta’s curiosity even more. At the same time it explained s _o_ much about their dynamic and their closeness.

“And when did you two get together?” Yuta stares at the pair.

Taeyong scrunches his brows at him. “We just told you.”

“Yeah, but like, when did you become a _pair_?” Yuta closes the notebook in his lap and edges forward.

“In second grade,” Jaehyun says, frustration lingering in his tone.  

“Yeah, I get that, you became friends in second grade.” Yuta taps his chest. “I’m asking when did you two become boyfriends.”

“Boyfriends?” Jaehyun shuts off his book in an abrupt manner, “You think we’re dating?” The sharpness in Jaehyuns makes Yuta flinch, like he was accusing Yuta of committing a heinous crime.  

“We’re not dating, Yuta,” Taeyong says, his hands flying around, trying to calm himself down. Yuta stares at Taeyong, who keeps opening and closing his mouth by the second. When Yuta is sure that Taeyong isn’t going to say anything, he speaks up.

“You’re not?” Yuta asks, Given everything else, this was the most bizarre thing he’d ever heard from them. “How can you deny being romantically involved with someone when you look at them like they gave birth to the moon?”

“That’s because we’re close, you and Johnny aren’t much different, either.” Taeyong points at Yuta, is he getting blamed for asking something intrusive? Why was Taeyong getting angry?

Taeyong’s entire  sentence hits Yuta a second later, was he implying that him and Johnny were on par with _them??_ This has to be _the most_ appalling thing Yuta has ever heard. Yes, Johnny and him were affectionate and did indulge in occasional back-hugs and cuddling sessions but they were no way near as overbearing as Taeyong and Jaehyun were.

“Please.” Yuta let out a sigh, exasperation painted all over his face. “When have you seen me cuddle Johnny in a Starbucks because he got a papercut?” It’s as if the pair want him to get riled up.

“Okay, it might not be at the same proximity” Jaehyun places his notebook on the table and points a finger at Yuta “but I have seen you two engage in five minute long no-homo-bro hugs.” Yuta wants to wipe that smirk off of Jaehyun’s face.

“First of all,” Yuta says, while gesturing Jaehyun to put down his finger before he breaks it. “It’s not no-homo, it’s pro-homo. We’re all gay. And second of all, it was because he had _just_ finished Death Note.”

“Awwwww..” Jaehyun’s expression changes within an instant, Yuta stares at Jaehyun, trying to absorb his absurd and very poor counter attack and _was that— were his eyes shining?_

He watches Taeyong swat Jaehyuns arm. “Focus, Jaehyun, you can dream about cuddling your dream hunk later.” Taeyong grabs Jaehyun’s arm and shakes him. “Right now, we have a point to prove.”

Yuta watches the entire scene unfold with a smirk on his face. He presses his back against the chair, folding his arms together. He stares at Jaehyun who is now fully aware of what is going on. The younger’s eyes widen with alarm. Taeyong, who has just realized the gravity of everything he has said, has guilt painted all over his face.

“He doesn’t- he doesn’t mean—” Jaehyun stutters.

“You like Johnny,” Yuta states.

The pair stare at each other their expressions overflowing with fear. Jaehyun looks at Yuta.

“Please don’t tell him,” Jaehyun says, on the verge of breaking down.

Yuta scoffs, _if only Jaehyun knew._ Maybe it’s the new found revelation of finding out that Taeyong is single; him and Jaehyun are not dating – Yuta has never been this happy in his entire university life.

Yuta smiles at Jaehyun, for the first time, genuinely.

“He likes red zinnias and purple hydrangeas, and—” Yuta leans over the table. “He’s single.” He winks at Jaehyun who stares at him, unable to decipher what is going on. Yuta is about to move away from the table when Jaehyun practically jumps at him.

Jaehyuns hugs are unbearably suffocating. Yuta thinks, Johnny would love them.

Ultimately, Taeyong drags Jaehyun off of him and moves his chair closer to Yuta, continually saying a mix of ‘ _are you okay’_ and ‘ _I’m sorry’._

Yuta feels hope taking over his mind at an alarming rate. He should stop himself. He knows. He knows that Taeyong being single might not lead to anything, but he’ll worry about that later. Possibly never. Right now, he wants to make the most of the undivided concern and attention Taeyong is blessing him with.

 

<> 

“I understand,” Johnny says while running his hand through his hair, “that you’re an accounting major for a reason but this is literally the worst poem I have ever read. You’re costing an entire language its dignity here.”

Yuta glares at Johnny from his bed. “You’re no Shakespeare either, dumbass. Don’t forget I was there when you helped Mark write a song for that girl he liked.”

A fleeting vision of the said memory passes through Yutas mind. Yuta had, never for a second, imagined that Mark would actually go through with Johnny’s stupid song, much less rap it.

It had hurt Yuta more than anyone else to watch the entire scenario unfold and then being the only one who could be there to console Mark. He was not interested in starring in the remake.

The universe has granted him a rare opportunity. After discovering that Taeyong’s eligible and single, he was not going to wait. He knew no one is going to ask Taeyong out anytime soon, given that everyone still believes he’s dating Jaehyun. It gives him a sense of comfort – he’s going to make this work. He just doesn’t know how to bring it up.

Taeyong had passed most of his quizzes and mids with ease and good grades; two more weeks and Yuta won’t be his T.A. anymore. It works both in and against his favor. Being Taeyong’s T.A. meant Yuta would still get to see Taeyong, but not in the way he wants to. Not being Taeyong.s T.A. meant they could do whatever they wanted with time at their disposable. But for that, Yuta would actually have to voice how he felt.

“Hello, Yuta-san, the legendary twentieth century poet. Come back to earth.” Johnny threw a paper ball at Yuta. The latter caught it before it hit him.

“What are you thinking about?” Johnny gets off the floor, settling next to Yuta on his bed.

“What if—”

“Yuta, no.” Johnny gives him _the_ look. “Stop trying to get a peek into the future. Live in the present, my man. It’s where we are right now.”

It’s not that Yuta is insecure; it’s never the fear of not being enough. It’s the fear of not being able to make things work. After the party, Yuta had run into Taeyong a handful of times, where they barely exchanged anything other than a few pleasantries. He has put Taeyong on a pedestal for almost a year; he never thought he would actually be blessed with the chance of befriending him and getting to know Taeyong at a less superficial level. Taeyong is so much more than Yuta had imagined him to be.

The kind to love, forgive, and care unconditionally; the first to accept his faults and apologize immediately; always acting on his paternal extinct. Yuta wouldn’t say he has lived a harsh life, but he knew that kindness mostly got you nowhere. People took advantage of you till you had nothing to give. Yuta would never call Taeyong stupid or naïve but he just didn’t know when to stop. Maybe that’s why Jaehyun always lingers around Taeyong. Knowing how overbearing Taeyongs personality could be.

Three weeks ago, when Yuta had shown up to their study session late and rattled, letting the stress of balancing a million things and his obnoxious family get to him. There constant advice about how he was going to be the source of his downfall was unwelcomed but Yuta still had to bear through it. Yuta has never liked being _told_ what to do. Taeyong was the first person to look him dead in the eye and tell him to go home and Yuta obeyed without objection.

It’s never about the grand gestures with Taeyong. He communicates care in the most mundane acts.

_‘You have practice thrice this week, let’s just reschedule so you won’t be worn out.’_

_‘My mom sent me a few herbs, so I brewed a few tonics for you.’_

_‘Have lunch with me and Jaehyun, I cooked a separate portion for you.’_

_‘You really should drink more water. Replace that venti Americano with a liter of water, Yuta.’_

“It’s just that.” Yuta can feel Johnny move closer, letting Yuta rest his head on his shoulder. “I’m going to miss him if he says no. I’m going to miss him so much and I know…” Yuta’s entire being flushes with the feeling of being lost and scared “It’s going to hurt him too you know, He cares. The guilt will eat him alive- I know it will- and he’s going try to fix the aftermath, trying to blame himself when it’s not even his fault.”

The outcome of pairing up someone who is used to caring without batting an eye with someone, whose pathway is so clear that there is no room for anyone else, is lethal.

 “I don’t ever want to be the one to hurt him, Johnny, I can’t do that.” Yuta whispers, not finding it in him to speak any louder.

Johnny drapes his arm around Yuta’s shoulders, pulling him closer. He ruffles Yuta’s hair. “You won’t hurt him, Yuta, no one ever cares that much for someone they don’t like a lot. Taeyong looks after you not because he does that for almost everyone around him but because he _likes_ you.”

Yuta turns to look at Johnny, there’s composure and sureness in his posture that Yuta wishes he possessed “How are you so sure—”

“You have to be _really_ good friends for him to bring you breakfast after your morning practice. He didn’t even hide the fact he came only to see you when Jaehyun was right there.”

Yuta smiles weakly. “Yeah, that was a good day.”

“I understand you don’t want to hurt him but if you don’t tell him it’s going to bother you.” Johnny pats Yuta’s shoulder, “Now come on, we have to burst into Marks place and finish this God awful poem.”

Yuta nods and gets up, he’ll have to be brave, even if it will cost him the little happiness he has right now.

<> 

It happens.

For the first time, he feels grateful for Jaehyun’s presence and his obnoxious remarks. They choose an appropriate time for their date. Yuta had withdrawn two hundred from his football shaped piggybank and decided to treat Taeyong to an ancient Greek delicacy –pancakes.

Everything goes so smoothly that Yuta can’t believe he ever doubted this. That is until—

“I am so sorry,” Mark sputters. Yuta gaze flicks from Mark to Taeyong. Whose ethereal hair is now drenched in maple syrup. Yuta tires to mask his horror and his apparent urge to flick Marks forehead. Yuta signals Yukhei to their table and whisper yells at him to take Mark away from them. 

“Are you okay?” Yuta stares at Taeyong, much to his surprise, the latter lets out a laugh.

“I’m fine,” Taeyong pulls out a bag of mini wet wipes from his bag and swipes it across his forehead before the syrup lands in his eyes. “You didn’t have to scare him like that. Poor kid he was so close to crying.”

Yuta scans the restaurant; only to find Mark hiding behind Yukhei next to the kitchen door. He gaze lingers on them for a second before he passes a discreet thumbs up to Yukhei, that eases out the tension from him. He watches Yukhei whisper something to Mark before looking away.

“Wanna get this packed and go to my place?” Taeyong says, while pressing down a wet wipe around his hairline. Yuta blinks several times to process in what Taeyong was implying.

“You know, I really want to wash my hair and I don’t this to be over just yet.” Taeyong smiles at him.

From then on, they progress seamlessly. From holding hands, to kissing, to cuddling wherever. Every word, every act of love comes so naturally. They fight and Yuta grows he out grows his temperament, his stubbornness, and over protectiveness with Taeyong by his side.

Sometimes the bad side gets the most of Yuta but now he doesn’t have to resort to alcohol and the company of just anyone. He has Taeyong.

A month progress into two and two into four and Yuta finds himself knocking his head against his study table in early February.

“Will you stop that, Romeo. We’re trying to watch a movie here.” Johnny throws a pillow at Yuta which doesn’t even land close to where later is sitting.

Yuta gets up, goes to the couch and settles next to Johnny. Jaehyun looks at him, moving away from his boyfriend.

“Hyung, your forehead is red.” Jaehyun gets up immediately. “Wait, I’ll get you an ice pack.”

“Hyunnie, he doesn’t need anything. Come back.” Johnny reaches out to grab Jaehyun’s hand but the latter swats it away.

Johnny scowls at Yuta. “He gets that from Taeyong,” Yuta says.

“Here.” Jaehyun gently presses a bag of peas against Yuta’s forehead. “What’s wrong, hyung?”

Johnny grabs Jaehyun’s hand, engulfing him in a hug resuming their cuddling session.

“Romeo can’t figure what to get his Romeo for Valentine’s Day,” Johnny says.

“Oh.” Jaehyun looks at Yuta. “Hyung, you know Yongiehyung doesn’t care for materialistic things. He’ll be happy even if you get him grocery coupons.”

“That’s the problem, Jaehyun.” Yuta places the bag of peas on the coffee table, feeling slightly better. “He’s so hard to buy for. I want give him something that’ll make him go like ‘ _This is literally the best thing anyone has ever done for_ _me_ ’ and I know coupons won’t bring out that feeling. With the amount of romantic things he indulges in, I have to come up with something creative.”

“So, what’s the problem?” Jaehyun asks.

“Yuta has no creative intellect whatsoever, babe,” Johnny murmurs into Jaehyun’s hair.

“Johnny!” Jaehyun jabs his elbow into Johnny’s ribcage.

“He’s right, though. Grocery coupons might make him happy but I know that going to Build A Bear and making him an actual bear will make him love me even more.” Yuta lets his head fall into the back of the sofa.

“Then why don’t you do that?” Johnny asks.

“The fuck do I know about building bears.” Yuta presses the bag of peas against his forehead. “Plus, Taeyong doesn’t like stuffed toys. Something about supernatural beings residing in them.”

“Hmmm, that’s true.” Jaehyun is playing with Johnnys fingers. Yuta sighs.

“This is too hard. I’ll just die,” Yuta says.

“You can’t die! You’re the first boyfriend Yongiehyung has had that isn’t an asshole,” Jaehyun says. Yuta watches Jaehyun’s expression turn sour, his eyebrows scrunch together and he lets out a weird noise, which can only be characterized as disgust.

“Worry about this later. I want to watch the end of this movie in peace.” Johnny claps his hands together, a sign of dismissal.

<> 

Yuta’s later comes a week after Valentine’s day. He had somehow caught a fever days before Valentine’s Day because of one of his students, resulting in him spending Valentine’s Day glued to his bed and without his Taeyong. Who wasn’t ready to prioritize his boyfriend being sick over his best friend’s birthday just yet. The only upside of him getting sick and his boyfriend leaving him alone was having more time to think.

The reciprocation still feels new, and it’s scary. Yuta has spent every spare second fabricating a world of what-if’s. Long hours spent creating and polishing moments, words, and feelings only he and Taeyong would share. 

 

The thought, just the thought, of any version of his fabricated realities existing in actual reality where Yuta didn’t have control over how things turn out fills him with anxiety.

 

A sudden gush of wind causes a chill down Yutas spine. Maybe taking a walk when the temperature was nearing negatives wasn’t exactly a good idea. But he isn’t going to back out now, not when he has a belated Valentines Day surprise to go through with.  His entire body shakes and so does his right hand which is currently being held by Taeyong. Yuta let’s out sharp breath and Taeyong instinctively moves closer to him.

 

“Are you sure you’re not cold?” There is concern draped over Taeyong’s face. Yuta can tell, Taeyong only blinks fifty times a millisecond when he’s nervous. 

 

Yuta smiles. “Yes, I’m fine.” 

 

Yuta looks away. Taeyong’s brows are still knitted with concern and Yuta can’t tell why his heart won’t calm down. 

 

Taeyong grabs Yuta’s arm “You know we can just go watch a movie. There’s a theatre right down—”

 

“Taeyong.” Yuta says.

 

They stop walking. Yuta gently reaches for Taeyong’s empty hand and with false bravado, takes a step closer to his boyfriend. “It’s our first Valentines, I want it to be special. I know you’re worried but I’m going to be fine. The fever has worn off. I’m semi-perfectly healthy.”

 

Taeyong sighs and tilts his head. “I know, I know. I just worry…” He leans his forehead on Yuta’s shoulder and buries his face in his boyfriend’s scarf. “Our semester starts next week and you have to pre-prepare academically and you’re behind football practice, too. I feel like I’m wasting your time. You could be doing something productive right now instead.” 

 

Yuta can feel the vibration of Taeyong’s voice against his chest and it does nothing to calm down his heart. He lets go of Taeyong’s hands and wraps his around the smaller man’s waist, pulling him closer. Yuta rests his chin on top of Taeyong’s mop of freshly dyed raven hair.

 

“I am being productive.” He presses a tight kiss against Taeyong’s head. “I’m catching up with my lovely boyfriend.” 

 

Taeyong slowly lifts his head, his eyes are wide open. Instead of radiating horror or reprimand, they’re brimming with surprise. As if he had expected Yuta anything less corny. Yuta knows he’s not convinced but he decides, as of right now, that he doesn’t care. 

 

“We’ll worry about everything tomorrow. Just be with me for now,” Yuta whispers. 

 

Taeyong drops his head back into Yuta’s scarf. 

 

“Fine,” he mutters. “Let’s go.” 

 

The gates of the stadium look daunting; the eerie environment does nothing to make it less scary. The lock in Yuta’s hands feels like he’s holding a block of ice. If he doesn’t manage to unlock it in the next few seconds his hands might actually freeze. He swears if Mark got him the wrong key he’ll— He hears a sharp click and relief passes through him.

 

With a bit of force he opens the gate and while entering, he grabs Taeyong’s hand without looking back and drags him in. 

 

“Yuta, your hands are freezing. Oh my—”

 

Yuta presses a finger against Taeyong’s lips. He lightly pushes Taeyong inside the stadium. 

 

“Just walk,” Yuta says.

 

“This better be worth it,” Taeyong says.

 

And it is.

 

Alleviation reigns through Yuta when Taeyong almost drops to his knees while he takes in his surroundings. 

 

A thick blanket is laid out in the middle of their university’s rather small football stadium. Two portable heaters are placed on both sides of the blanket, there’s a huge picnic basket sitting on it.

 

Taeyong turns around and looks at Yuta, his mouth is wide open along with his eyes –he’s wearing a dumbfounded look.

 

Yuta feels a sudden urge to drop everything and kiss Taeyong until neither can breathe. But he doesn’t. Instead, he waits for Taeyong’s question. 

 

“What?” Taeyong says, breathlessly.

 

“Remember we took the same intro to astronomy class in fall?” Taeyong meekly nods. “I overheard you tell Jaehyun that you’d want your ideal date to be just like this. Stargazing on a cold winter night, and that would be ideal because leeching warmth would be a great reason to be extra clingy with your date.” Taeyong lets out a laugh before Yuta adds, “and also because you used to be a freak about astronomy.” 

 

Taeyong looks at him, awestruck; eyes glistening, mouth agape. In an instance, the look of wonderment changes to recognition. “That was like, over a year ago. We didn’t even know each other, how do you even remember?” 

 

Yuta wants to tell Taeyong that its Taeyong Yuta is dealing with; Taeyong, who could, within an instant, make Yuta drop all his inhibitions.

 

There’s nothing more Yuta wants than to see Taeyong this _.... happy_. 

 

“It’s you.” Yuta looks away. “Of course, I remember.” 

 

Yuta feels cold hands grab both sides of his face. A blink and Yuta feels whole.

 

The touch against Yuta lips is fleeting, more than peck but less than actual kiss. It’s a testimony to how much they’ve grown together.

 

Taeyong, who Yuta has gotten to know to in so many ways, who has held Yuta’s hand and assured him in moments of self-depreciation that, “yes, he is good enough”; who, with a simple disregard of his own well-being, dropped everything just to nurse him back to health; Taeyong, who has become a constant in Yuta’s life; who makes Yuta feel like he can conquer the world just by being strong enough to get out of bed; Taeyong, who is uttering grave words of affection for Yuta while their lips are pressed against each other’s. 

 

Over the last few months they’ve gotten to know each other intimately, Yuta now knows Taeyong as a real person. He knows that in certain moments, Taeyong just wants someone to tell him that he’s loved, wanted and appreciated, and Yuta is willing to make the ends of the world meet if that’s what it takes for him to see Taeyong self –assured and happy. 

 

 

<> 


End file.
